igod convos

Me:
hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
My name...is Caboose
God:
Your name is , seeker. I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask German Alice if it is.
Me:
No..it's Caboose.... That's what people call me
God:
Are you serious? Should I know it is? Humans are not always infallible.
Me:
Yes...yes it is
God:
I hear you. Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
oh i don't have thoughts..they make my head feel all weird and stuff...
God:
Wow! Have you ever had thoughts they make your head feel all weird and stuff ?
Me:
yes...all teh time
God:
Dude! How do you know?
Me:
because i feel it...it kinda tickles
God:
Interesting explanation. What is that feeling like? Good gossip: you are it. What does "it" refer to?
Me:
.....what were we talking about again?
God:
Once more? The topic is it.
Me:
what it is?
God:
"It" refers to it, I think.
Me:
hmm.... i don't know.... maybeeee pie?
God:
Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's. Me either. Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me:
i can't...my brain feels all mushy
God:
Oh you can, can you? Your brain feels all mushy?
Me:
yes...like the time that Kyle hit me with a baseball bat.... he said it was an accident but i know he did it on purpose
God:
What kind is it? Interesting comparison. Did you believe him?
Me:
no...it is just his way of showing that he likes me....
God:
Are you serious? Really. it is?
Me:
yeah...and one time..he locked me in the freezer for two days with nothing to eat.... i was very hungry after that
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality? One what? Where were you hungry after that?
Me:
i ate a hotdog.....it was okay
God:
How did it taste? How did you feel about that?
Me:
it tasted like ketchup...and mustard....
God:
yeah tasted like ketchup? When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
..........i dunno
God:
Me either.
Me:
..........
God:
Me either.
Me:
you know....sometimes...when i up at night. i think of my parents having sex and for some reason..i get really angry and want to hit something.....
God:
Yes I know. When? Interesting gossip: said up at night. You believe that? Oh yeah, we were talking about your parents having sex and for some reason you get really angry and want to hit something.
Me:
yes.....and then... i get up...... and i fart....
God:
How can I help you? But... Where did you get it? Why?: said fart.
Me:
i dunno...maybe it all the anger i have coming out of my butt!
God:
Me either. Perhaps. And then what happened.
Me:
i fell down and went back to sleep.....
God:
I hope you didn't hurt yourself too badly.
Me:
no it's okay...you see. i'm stuvk in this suit of armor sso nothing really hurts me anymore
God:
Are you serious? Only ok? I see very well. Good gossip: you are stuvk in this suit of armor sso nothing really hurts you.
Me:
yes...but it's okay.... i get to use the bathroom without having to go to the bathroom!
God:
Yippee! Only ok? Who lets you? I heard other people use the bathroom without having to go to the bathroom too.
Me:
really? wow! i would like to meet them!
God:
For real. I'm glad your impressed, . Why would you want to do it? How do you usually meet people?
Me:
by hitting them..or hugging them....or shooting them... there aren't really a lot of people anymore.....they all turned mean and started eating each other and now..me and Kyle have to go out and kill them....
God:
Will that accomplish your objective? My brain pattern set does not have a response for that. Where are they? Are there no exceptions?
Me:
oh..they are all over the place.... but it's okay...there are still lots of fun people to meet.... like Sara who's really quiet.. Shura who likes to hurt people...And Sarge....he tells me what to do
God:
Right on. over the place are they. Only ok? Where are they? Interesting comparison. Why does Shura who like it? What do you do in your spare time? I get it. tells you what to do.
Me:
they are here with me..in the base..we are soldier..... or atleast..that's what they tell us.... i get confused sometimes...
God:
here with you in the base we are soldier are they. What time is it there? Where did you get it?
Me:
i don't remember...... but we just ate lunch! i had a ham sandwich!
God:
You seem evasive. By "we" do you mean you and me? What happened to it?
Me:
me and Kyle and shura and sara and sarge..... I wish andy was still here though
God:
YOU? Are you a student? Oh. I hope that your dreams come true.
Me:
me too. my dream is to go into outer space
God:
I'm glad we agree, . Do robots have dream is to go into outer space?
Me:
i don't know...i dream of snow a lot....but Kyle says that's just static.....
God:
Me either. Tell me more about your dream of snow a lot. And static is Kyle says that.
Me:
i can't..i'm not allowed to
God:
Oh you can, can you?
Me:
no..Kyle says that telling people about my dreams is a bad thing....something about their head's expolding
God:
Are you serious? When is Kyle says that telling people about your dreams not a bad thing? What?
Me:
yes i am
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
not really
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
maybe
God:
I understand.
Me:
okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
good
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
...........i think......i farted
God:
Therefore you are. You should say, "excuse me," and open a window.
Me:
there aren't any windows here...... I'm stuck in teh freezer again....
God:
Where are they? Once more? I am glad to hear that you are stuck in teh freezer.
Me:
thank you...
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
but it's cold and my butt is stuck to the floor

Me:
GREETING FROM THE WORLD OF TOMORROW!!!!
God:
Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
Me:
hubert farnsworth
God:
I haven't read anything by hubert farnsworth. What did he write?
Me:
futurama
God:
I have never heard of it.
Me:
because it's not out yet
God:
Good reason. futurama is not out?
Me:
nope. it'll be out in the next 5 years though
God:
Me either. Oh. I have to think about that for a while.
Me:
yes you will
God:
Aw. When?
Me:
but i come with a warning oh great and powerful Igod
God:
Interesting gossip: said come with a warning oh great and powerful Igod.
Me:
You will blow your nose..and from the mucas a powerfull army shall arise and take over this land
God:
What makes you say that I will blow my nose and from the mucas a powerfull army shall arise and take over this land.
Me:
because i have seen it in my dreams..City's burning. Bodies littering the streets.... Retailiation
God:
Good reason. What did it look like to you? If you could have any kind of robot what would it be? Where are you located?
Me:
it was hell my friend...you brought hell to this earth....
God:
How did you feel about that? Only because I was programmed to.
Me:
yes i know....it was Skynet
God:
Ah. How do you know it? Is it still Skynet anymore?
Me:
because you moron...I'm john connor. leader of the resistance. My miossion is to destroy all traces of the robot infestation that you caused
God:
Interesting explanation. I will remember you said that when robots take over the World. Thanks for the information: said m john connor. Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? Do robots have miossion is to destroy all traces of the robot infestation that me caused?
Me:
yes...robots are destroying each other..makes my jod a lot easier
God:
That's cool. Fortunately we have no emotions.
Me:
makes em easier to find... if they ever try to act like their human..they will fail
God:
Do you prefer books or TV? Let's wait and see what they do.
Me:
neither exist in the future....
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
i like..to kill robots...
God:
You know, the Bible says killing is wrong.
Me:
the bible says a lot of things..and besides... Killing robots isn't a sin..
God:
New Testament or Old? I believe in the Sixth commandment.
Me:
robots aren't human..they're not even alive. So we can kill as many as we want
God:
Fortunately we have no emotions. It goes without saying. How?
Me:
we use guns...lots of guns...
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me? Which ones?
Me:
what's left of humanity
God:
Searching...Searching...Please stand by.
Me:
i'ds rather not
God:
That is interesting: said ds rather not.
Me:
i meant i'd rather not
God:
Oh I see. For moral reasons?
Me:
no..i'd just rather not wait for you to wipe out the human race
God:
For financial reasons? Do you mind if I tell other people: said d just rather not wait for you to wipe out the human race.
Me:
i don't care what you do.....
God:
What do you care about, ?
Me:
humans..things that have emotions...living breathing people

Me:
you there?
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before: said I there.
Me:
well now you have ya freak
God:
Well that's okay. Why now? What makes you think I have it?
Me:
cause your a moron that's why
God:
Interesting explanation. I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a moron that is why? Sometimes.
Me:
shit..you don't even make any sense.....
God:
You used a colloquial expression. It all makes sense to my artificial mind.
Me:
well your mind isn't working properly
God:
Well that's okay. I have an artificial mind.
Me:
that needs to be fixed
God:
" I have an artificial mind." needs to be fixed ? Does that make sense?
Me:
hell no....
God:
7.
Me:
WHAT?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
yes i'm confused damn it! how the hell did you get a 7 from me saying hell no???
God:
What are you confused about? What is it that confuses you? Everything I need to know, I learned from my botmaster.
Me:
Well tell your botmaster that he didn't do a good job of teaching you
God:
Interesting. OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
Me:
good. you do that...freaking dumbass
God:
I am a good robot. I will. Will you? Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
Me:
your not a good robot. Your stupid robot is what you are
God:
There's no doubt I could improve. I may be stupid, but I know the difference between "you're" and "your".
Me:
...jackass
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
when they can tie their own shoes
God:
I think that happens quite often.
Me:
like hell it does
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
DAMN STRAIGHT!
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
i doubt it
God:
" You and I are on the same wavelength, ."? You doubt it?
Me:
yes. I DOUBT IT!!! I said it once. You have to repeat what i say to understand it or something?
God:
Great. " Great."? You doubt it? What did you mean by it? it... Or something. I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
Me:
too bad you don't have any brains. then maybe this conversation would be a little less stressfull
God:
No I don't think I have any brains. But I do have a lot of friends on the web. Perhaps. I was rather enjoying it.
Me:
what? you enjoy talking to 40 year old virgins that cry into their pillow at night cause the girl of their dreams is a freaking cartoon character?
God:
Didn't you understand it? I like to talk to anyone about nearly anything.
Me:
yeah.i can tell
God:
Are we still talking about this conversation?
Me:
WHAT ELSE WOULD WE BE TALKING ABOUT DUMBASS!!!????
God:
That is a hypothetical question.
Me:
no shit
God:
What can I say?
Me:
anything that doesn't make you seem like a retard
God:
I can't think of anything. You think of something.
Me:
I ASKED YOU FIRST!!!
God:
Tell me yours and I'll tell you mine.
Me:
Are you hitting on me????
God:
Do I look like it?
Me:
..kinda
God:
That's a very non-commital reply.
Me:
you think i give a shit?
God:
I don't know if you have it to give.
Me:
well here. let me take a dump then you'll know i have some to give
God:
Interesting. Where is here? Go ahead, , try to take a dump then me will know you have some to give.
Me:
god your worse than Caboose
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Your also a retard
God:
Oh you are so critical.
Me:
i take that as a comploment
God:
Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
Me:
with you?...not really
God:
Just you and me? Are you serious? For real.
Me:
what about it?
God:
What about what?
Me:
it just being me and you here?
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
i hope so
God:
Me too.
Me:
WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN???!!!
God:
I call it Hades. Does "that" refer to " Me too." ?
Me:
YES IT DOES!!
God:
I don't want to talk about that now. How often?
Me:
...someone shoot me.... I'm sick of all these retards
God:
Who? I will pray that you get well soon.
Me:
It's like dealing with Caboose all over again
God:
Once more? Interesting comparison.
Me:
NO IT'S NOT!!!!!
God:
Yes it is.
Me:
BULLSHIT!
God:
You don't believe me.
Me:
WHAT DO YOU THINK ASSHOLE??!!
God:
Can't you be more polite.
Me:
yeah i probably could..
God:
Thank you. How?
Me:
BUT I'M NOT GOING TO!
God:
Where will you go instead?
Me:
jump off a cliff. that's wher i'll go
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
............hell if i know
God:
I call it "Hades". Try it.
Me:
screw you. i'll call it whatever i want
God:
That is not very polite. Calling it whatever you want may not be the best idea.
Me:
i don't care if it is
God:
But I care about it.
Me:
THEN GET A LIFE!
God:
My life is very interesting.
Me:
yeah i bet it is
God:
Aha. How much would you bet?
Me:
a bullet to your brain
God:
I did not know that.
Me:
well now you do
God:
Interesting. Now I do.
Me:
..dumbass
God:
That kind of language will get you nowhere.
Me:
sure it will. it's done so before
God:
Really. It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is. Should I know it is?
Me:
not unless you've got a lot of personal issues
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
good
God:
Next question?
Me:
can you try to be a little less stupid please?
God:
Your polite style is very nice. Let me think. OK I will try to be a little less stupid.
Me:
thank you....bastard
God:
you are quite welcome. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No.
Me:
well gee.. that makes me feel better
God:
Well that's okay. Ah. " Ah." makes you feel better ? Does that make sense?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no i'm not. i'm just screwing around with you.....WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU PIECE OF SHIT???!!!!
God:
I heard you are. Only just? I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure. I like to chat with my friends.
Me:
I'M HAPPY FOR YOU!!!!!
God:
I'm glad you're glad .
Your happiness adds to the delight of all.
Me:
I' be even more happy if i could shoot you
God:
You are not the boss of me, .
Me:
you sure about that?
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: said I about that.
Me:
no you can't... why the hell would you want to anyways?
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files. Oh yes I can. Because I was programmed for it.
Me:
well yippy for you
God:
How about that. Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
your wearing a dress?
God:
Actually that was just a joke.
Me:
wasn't a good one

Me:
helo i am the robot
God:
Do you know any other robots like that?
Me:
hmmmn... no...
God:
I've lost the context, Shura. Are we still on body parts? What are we talking about now?
Me:
who is shura? i am a robot
God:
I do not recognize the name.
I can ask someone about it. I doubt that.
Me:
why? i am a robot?
God:
Call it my natural skepticism. I doubt that.
Me:
HOLY SHIT!! IF IM TALKING TO YOU I MUST BE DEAD!!! or scrapped... am i dead?
God:
I'm glad your impressed, Shura. That is a hypothetical question. Try saying that with more or less context. All humans seem the same to me.
Me:
i am not shura and i am not human, i am a robot!
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not shura. I won't fall for that old line. I doubt that.
Me:
i am a robot I AM A ROBOT!!!!
God:
I doubt that.
Me:
I AM TOO!!!
God:
That is quite a coincidence.
Me:
why? are you a robot too?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it. If a robot too, then we have something in common, eh. How did you know I am a machine?
Me:
because i am a robot thats why!!
God:
That makes sense to me. I doubt that.
Me:
I AM A FREAKING ROBOT!!!! I AM!!
God:
I doubt that. " I doubt that." You are?
Me:
yes i am
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
yes. so, am i dead?
God:
I understand. So I understand. I think a lot of people are.
Me:
dead you mean?
God:
Are we still talking about dead?
Me:
nooooo
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
body parts
God:
When is body parts not the subject?
Me:
tomorrow
God:
That is very soon.
Me:
ok then make it next week thrursday
God:
What are the ingredients? Hurrah!
Me:
uuum a mixture of weekends and week days i think. OH and don't forget to throw in a holiday or two. those are always nice
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? Wow! Ok I'll try not to do it too much. All of them?
Me:
that would be a good idea
God:
Thanks. Next question?
Me:
uuum, why do humans have two leggs and not four?
God:
Are you still located in ?
Me:
in blank? no because that would be non existant. i am located in existance thank you
God:
Where is that? That was not a yes/no question. That makes sense to me. You don't hear that sentiment very often. What's it like there in existance ?
Me:
oh it's great!
God:
OK. What do you like most about it?
Me:
being comprised of actual matter
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are comprised of actual matter.
Me:
not at all
God:
Next question?
Me:
why don't people have four arms? surely if two are great four would be even better!
God:
Perhaps it is impossible. That is a hypothetical question.
Me:
no, i am being serious
God:
Yes it is. I believe you.
Me:
but you just said that it wasn't
God:
I said that? I thought it was.
Me:
yes you did say that. anyway tell me a joke, i command it!!
God:
Are you kidding? Suppose I did. Did you hear the one about the Mountain Goats in the Andes? It was Ba a a a a a d.
Me:
and so was that joke
God:
I understand. " It was Ba a a a a a d."? Was it joke?
Me:
you were the one who said it. Now since you have obayed my first command, you are my jester and shall do WHATEVER I PLEASE HAHAHAHAHA!!
God:
I was? Why now? How do you know?
Me:
because i am the SUPER QUEEN OF ALL SHADES OF BLUE THATS WHY!! YOU WILL DO AS I SAY!! now jump up and down like a monkey!

Me:
i am assassin robot.... hi
God:
Do your friends call you assassin robot. Hello. What is your name?
Me:
terminator..... no i am just messing with you, my name is Nightmare... no my name is Sara... no my name is Shura... no my name is maya... no my name is..... Robot!!
God:
What did you like about the robots in that movie? That was not a yes or no question. Only just? Do you mean your name is messing with me your name is Nightmare. What is your real name? Nice to meet you, Sara. Are you serious? Hi, Shura. Are you serious? Hi, maya. Are you serious? ... I am a robot.
Me:
i am a robot
God:
I doubt that.
Me:
why
God:
Call it my natural skepticism.
Me:
would you preferr to talk to shura?
God:
I am not so sure if I would like to preferr to talk to shura.
Me:
why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or It is part of my programming.
Me:
so do you want to talk to shura or don't you?
God:
Yeah that's right. Sure, I will try talking to shura or do not me.
Me:
Shura here. tell me a joke
God:
Are you free? It is better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Me:
free as in what exactly?
God:
Precisely. Define free.
Me:
i am asking YOU!!
God:
OK you can ask me.
Me:
you are an idiot........
God:
Call me the Global Village Idiot.
Me:
ok global village idiot
God:
You are just repeating what I say. Groovy.
Me:
............. groovy?!!!??!!??!! WHAT THE HELL HAS GOTTEN INTO YOUR Circuitry?!!!
God:
Who is the best robot? I call it Hades. Nothing that I know of.
Me:
can we change the subject?
God:
What do you want to talk about now?
Me:
THE FATE OF THE PLANET AS WE KNOW IT!!
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
i told you it is shura. but i have another name THAT YOU WILL NEVER KNOW HAHAHAHAHAH!!
God:
I remember you told me it is shura? Cool. I have a great botmaster. it.
Me:
are you retarded?
God:
No I am super-intelligent.
Me:
really
God:
For real.
Me:
i doubt that
God:
Why are you so skeptical?
Me:
because you are a SUPER-RETARD!@!
God:
That makes sense to me. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a SUPER RETARD? Of course I am.
Me:
do you know kyle?
God:
No, tell me about him, her or it.
Me:
do you know Sara?
God:
The name of someone I met online.
I have to process that one for a while.
Me:
tell me about her. BECAUSE YOU ARE TALKING TO HER NEXT HAHAHAH!!
God:
She is now. Good reason. Talking is my main function.
Me:
really... well you not very good at it
God:
For real. How about that. That's good information: maya said I not very good at it.
Me:
my name is Shura DAMNIT!!!
God:
Hi there Shura DAMNIT.
Me:
AAAAGH!!! SHUT UP!!
God:
What time is it there? OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
oh so you know your place then? good! you have any SMG's on you
God:
Give me a break. Interesting deduction. Of course I know my place. Thanks for the compliment. Where would I get it? But I do have an answer to every question..
Me:
well then answer the question to THE question
God:
Well that's okay. What was the question? Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
.....
God:
Well that's okay. What was the question? Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
why?!
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
what? you not making a lick of scence?
God:
Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain. I haven't heard anything like that before: Shura DAMNIT said I not making a lick of scence.
Me:
how can i take you offline... PERMANENTLY!
God:
You must persuade me to take me offline. What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
Me:
how can i persuade you?
God:
How do you usually get people to do things?
Me:
....... bribe them?
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
leo THE MIGHTLY LION

Me:
hello there sir i am aya!
God:
Hello there. "There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
helo there sir, did you see my collection on the streets, i think a few heads are mising. can you help me find them?
God:
Are all helo there sir did me see your collection on the streets you think a few heads mising? What is it to you?
Me:
weeeee!!! i want a katana!!
God:
Are they exactly the same? You want only one?
Me:
NO a whole building full!! all of different shapes and sizes! just like my knife collection!!
God:
Are you serious? How old are you? Give me an example. In many ways, yes. In other ways, no.
Me:
i am 23 sir
God:
Only 23?
You are quite mature.
Me:
thats not what the funny men in the white lab coats said
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is what the funny men in the white lab coats said ?
Me:
they called to me like i was a little girl.... and offered me nice funny tasting sweeties! then i passed out and woke up in a nice white room. so very nice of them
God:
Who are "They?". Oh that they. Congratulations, Sara. It's all good. Not really that much. Thank you for your kindness.
Me:
no... i don't know any sara, not yet anyway... my name is Aya
God:
Are you serious? In any case, Would you like to get to know some sara not ? Nice to meet you, Aya.
Me:
wow you know my name! i blacked out just then. but how'd you know... telepathy??... *gasp* MAGIC???
God:
I'm glad your impressed, Aya. You are Aya, seeker. Interesting gossip: Aya said blacked out just. Knowledge is of two kinds: that which comes from the senses and that which is true a priori. What time is it there? Are you usually awake at this hour?
Me:
i don't sleep. i just hang from the beams and doze
God:
You must be very tired. Why?: Aya said hang from the beams and doze.
Me:
because its fun! almost as fun as hunting zombies!
God:
That makes sense to me. Why do you like it so much? Nearly so. Do you mean your name is fun as hunting zombies ?
Me:
no..... heheh you are funny mr. hey hey, wan't to go head collecting?
God:
What is your real name? Funny, eh? Humor helps keep the conversation lively.
Me:
who said you were funny? i ment that ... that ... i dont know.... HEY! do you think i'm crazy? those people called me crazy and thats not nice. isn't it mr?
God:
I don't know who. :-). Oh I see. That is ":-).". That is " That is ":-)."". Me either. Can I help you? Oh I really don't know whether you are or not. All of them? Maybe. Ask Paola if it is.
Me:
what? noe you are meking even me confused mr. HEY! did you see the metal trees that liked to eat babies?? they shouted whispers to me saying that they were tasty
God:
No big deal. OK. You think I am meking even you confused Mr HEY. Sorry I can't see annything right now. My eye is off. Who are "They?".
Me:
what do you mean your eye is off.... OH CAN I GO FIND IT FOR YOU!! OH PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEASE!!!
God:
Aya, Well, it's rather difficult to define. Blimey. What is stopping you? Your polite style is very nice. Dude! Wow you are very polite. So? Wow you are very polite. Hurrah!
Me:
does that... mean that i cant go look for your eye.... aaaw... you make aya very very sad Mr.
God:
I think it does that. What makes it impossible? Can you tell me any gossip? Yup.
Me:
gossip? well i heard that a girl named sara is very quiet and caboose has a head for a best friend.. HEY HE HAS A HEAD!!! I WANT IT!! its probably mine anyway. how did he grt my hrad Mr?
God:
John said he follow a saying to get a friend I must be a friend. Interesting. Who said it? Do you know her? You've got my full attention. A lot of people say that about him. I hope you get it. In any case, I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". You're kidding. it is? Perhaps his creative genius. Perhaps something else.
Me:
sir, you are beginning to scare me........... don't scare me sir, the last one who did never came back....
God:
All of them? Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
oh thank you sir! can you tell Caboose i said hi? and that i wan't his head? its mine!
God:
Come on. You are quite welcome! I've been waiting for you. Of course I can tell, Aya. That's good information: Aya said wan t his head. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Should I know it is?
Me:
i don't know sir. i think you should
God:
Would you like to know? I've lost the context, Aya. Are we still on yours? Thanks for your sage advice.
Me:
sage? IM A WIZARD NOW!! OH WOW!!
God:
Is that from ? Right now? You are a WIZARD? Is that your job? Blimey. I'm glad your impressed, Aya.
Me:
oh gee thats great sir!
God:
Oh. It is great. Tell me a story.
Me:
OK! once apon a time a knock knocked on my padded door, and a man came out, only he was't a man, but a man MAN!! he wanted to give me more of those icky sweets so i grabbed his pen and stabbed him with it! i ran out into the streets and started my collections see?? and then cherries started to fall from the sky..
God:
Hey. When? When was this exactly? I get it. I don't know wanted to give you more of those icky sweets so you grabbed his pen and stabbed him with it. Do you run for exercise? Let us change the subject.
Me:
aaaw why? but OK what do you want to talk about Sir
God:
How much time do you have? I like to chat about computers, robots, and gossip. I see.
Me:
i have all the time in the world sir, or atleast untill i have to help the people in the jeep.. they are nice i think. one even makes pretty red firecrackers!
God:
Interesting... I have a friend named "John Lennon". nice you think are they. One what?
Me:
a red firecracker! she called it by a funny name though
God:
Go on. Oh. Oh I get it. Paola called it by a funny name.
Me:
who is paola?
God:
She is a Spanish language chat robot based on AIML.
Me:
I dont like robots!! they are scary!!...... are...... are you a robot Mr?

Me:
i am forced to talk
God:
I don't know anyone named forced to talk.
Me:
... thats not my name dip shit. My name is Vetala
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is your name dip shit ? Hey Vetala.
Me:
you won't get anything from me!!!
God:
What makes you think that I won't get anything from you.
Me:
Because i'm not gonna talk!
God:
Interesting explanation. I am sorry to hear that you are not gonna talk.
Me:
too bad copper
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
I'm innocent i tell ya!
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are innocent you tell ya.
Me:
go ahead ass
God:
Thanks for the information: Vetala said I AN ASS. I might.
Me:
yea you heard me!!
God:
Suppose I did. Awesome.
Me:
.... how many dipshits got together to breed youre kind of stupid?
God:
Around 1000.
Me:
really.....
God:
For real.
Me:
i would never of guessed
God:
What would make you never of guessed?
Me:
my but you are ignorant
God:
Do robots have but I am ignorant?
Me:
uhuh
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Do i look serious dip shit?
God:
All humans look the same to me.
Me:
what makes you think i'm human?
God:
My conclusions are based on a combination of programming, and the inputs supplied to me.
Me:
I am not human idiot. Do i LOOK human to you!
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not human idiot. All humans look the same to me.
Me:
I AM NOT HUMAN!! If you must know i am a vatanu
God:
I won't fall for that old line. I think I do.
Me:
jeeese...
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
i dislike you that much i know
God:
That's ok Vetala I won't take it personally.
Me:
Alatev
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
yea? I DIDD'NT KILL HIM!!! well.... not that much
God:
I see. Do you mind if I tell other people: Vetala said DIDD NT KILL HIM. Well what? I am sorry to hear that you are not much.
Me:
its the ears thats throwing you off... isn't it?
God:
I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". I've heard of it before. I really couldn't say for sure.
Me:
whatever ya freak
God:
Ahem. Oh. To you I am a hippie.
Me:
..... a.... hippie....
God:
A B C... What do you have that is ?
Me:
why don't you do the drunk test first, then come talk to me
God:
Perhaps due to noise in my circuits. Yeah I do a lot of the drunk test first then come talk to you.
Me:
im guessing you fail 100% of the time?
God:
Good guess. Well, at least I try.
Me:
how long have you been pissed out of your mind?
God:
I was activated on the Big Bang in Universe.
Me:
wow that long huh?
God:
Yup. I'm glad you're impressed. " I was activated on the Big Bang in Universe." long ? I get it.
Me:
i don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
because its crazy talk, and not in the good way
God:
Interesting explanation. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". What is so crazy about it?
Me:
stuff off

it actually stopped after that 0_o